mias-back-from-the-dead:

professionalchaoticdumbass:

Opening Task Manager to scare the programs into behaving again

cocks task manager like a shotgun

softwaring:

softwaring:

i posted this aug 9th last year and it’s just gotten WORSE

aflo:

guerrillatech:

posting this on twitter will get you put into witness protection

marinella-ela:

formlessdemi:

monsterbutch:

this is one of my favorite reddit posts of all time

God forbid Chippy do anything

batbetbitbotbut:

clementineoil:

i love when flowers close in the evening like good night girl i love you sleep tight

#HELLO IT IS TIME FOR MY FAVORITE FACT#which is that sometimes when the flowers close there is a little bee inside#spending the night all cozy and safe in his little nook#specifically male squash bees do this in squash flowers#look at a field of squash or pumpkins at night and there are little guys snoozing in there#this knowledge brings me such joy that i must share it with the world (tags via @scribefindegil)

animentality:

variablejabberwocky:

obtusecrimes:

literallymechanical:

slimegargoyle:

pro tip if you start saying hewwo as a joke it will eventually come to be your standard greeting for all loved ones 

Or, in a more generalized form, beware what thou do ironically, lest thou begin to do it ronically.

Started out as a bit, how did it end up like this

it was only a bit IT WAS ONLY A BIT

#beware of the running joke#because someday it will catch you